d up in her room。 Nothing bad ever happened in the hotel room。
There’s a first time for everything。
Besides； what was the point of even trying anymore； Blair thought as she took a gulp of her drink； then hiccupped。 She knew drinking away her sorrows wasn’t exactly ideal； but she didn’t want to face her gigantic shitstorm of a life right now。 Her relationship was ruined。 She hated Serena。 Nate was just a dumb； horny boy； and the thing that sucked about that was that she’d known it for years。 And she had no idea where the fuck she’d even live when she got back to Yale。 Would she be homeless？
Maybe she should just move to another country and start all over again。
She drained the rest of her drink and switched out the light。 Maybe if she lay still and focused on breathing in and out； she could at least fall asleep for a few hours。 Then tomorrow would be a new day。 She’d make herself leave the hotel； buy a pretty orange leather Hermès notebook； sit in Amaranth； order a vodka gimlet； and write a to…do list。 She always used to make to…do lists for class； and they helped keep her on track。 Maybe she’d also buy herself a bag from Hermès； just as a congratulatory present for making it through what was probably the worst winter vacation anyone had ever had。
Just as she was falling asleep； she was aware of the sound of the door clicking open。 It was either Pete or a serial killer。 And really； what did she have to lose either way？
Blair quickly adjusted the straps of her Cosabella tank top and folded her hands by her head； as if she’d just moved in her sleep。 If it was Pete； she wanted him to see her sleeping sweetly。 He’d soften and profess his love； thinking that she couldn’t hear。 Then； he’d kiss her awake； like the prince waking Sleeping Beauty； and they’d live happily ever after。
And if it’s a serial killer？
Blair felt a warm hand on her hip； just above her La Perla boy…cut panties。 She murmured slightly； nestling into the warm body settling in next to her。 She smelled the scent of L’Occitane soap and a little bit of pot。 As soon as she inhaled； a tingly feeling shot through her。 It smelled like Nate。 Nate had somehow sensed her distress； and e for her。 Maybe this was all a dream； but at this point； she’d take dream Nate。 She squeezed her eyes shut； not wanting to wake up and break the spell。
“You’re my East； my West； my North； my South。 Blair； you’re my girl；” the voice said hoarsely。
Blair bolted upright and reached for the lamp。 Bright light filled the room。 There； wearing a pair of rumpled khakis and a misbuttoned dark blue Ralph Lauren shirt； was Nate。 Real Nate。 Not Dream Nate。
“What the fuck？” Blair’s heart was hammering in her chest。 She yanked the duvet cover around her body and covered herself。
Not like he hasn’t seen it all before。
“You’re beautiful；” Nate said slowly。 His large green eyes were hazy and his hair was sticking up on one side。
“You’re drunk and high and you need to get out of here；” Blair said shortly。
“I love you；” Nate said simply。 He propped his head up on his hand and continued to gaze at Blair。 “I needed to see you。”
“Oh；” Blair considered； still blinking in the bright light。 What was she supposed to say to that？ She felt like she was watching a foreign film whose subtitles had suddenly stopped running。 “How did you know I was here？” she finally asked。 Nate was obviously hammered； but he looked so sincere and innocent lying on his side； as if they were back in high school。 It made her want to punch him； then hug him； then push his hair back and tell him everything would be all right。 She appraised him again。 Maybe after he took a shower。
The door clicked open； shedding amber light from the hallway onto the off…white rug。
“Blair？”
Blair whirled around to see Pete standing in the doorframe； holding a bouquet of red roses。 His face drained of color as his blue eyes flicked between Blair and Nate。 He opened and closed his mouth； like a goldfish。
“Pete！” Blair squeaked。
He exhaled loudly； the sound of his breath filling the room and morphing into a strangled cry。 He hurled the flowers to the ground and an explosion of red petals scattered on the thick blue carpet。
“I can explain；” Blair said in horror。 She knew how bad this looked。 She knew there really wasn’t a logical explanation。 But she needed Pete to know this was a total misunderstanding。 “Please listen；” Blair choked out； diving toward Pete。
“You’re in bed with that asshole？” Pete asked。 And then he laughed； one short； angry bark。 “Of course you are。” He shook his head。
“No；” she protested。 She felt like she was going to throw up。 This could not be happening。 Please believe me； she silently begged。 “He’s drunk and he just found me。 He just came in like two seconds ago。 I thought he was you。”
Pete shook his head sadly； as if Blair’s explanation was so ridiculous he felt embarrassed even to be hearing it。
“Dude； sorry；” Nate said； trying to stand up。 He understood this was bad。 He didn’t want Blair to go back to that other guy； but he also didn’t want to hurt her。 And now he was； and it was all so fucking confusing。 His foot got caught in a tangle of sheets and he face…planted on the floor。
Karma’s a bitch。
“You deserve each other；” Pete said； turning on his heel and slamming the door。 Blair could hear his footsteps tromping down the hall。 The elevator whooshed open and he was gone。 She turned and gazed down at Nate； pathetically collapsed in a pile。
“Fuck you；” she whispered； her eyes finally filling with all the tears she’d held in for the past day。 Every time。 Every time。 Every time she was almost happy； Nate managed to fuck it up。 Even worse； every time she managed to fall for it。
“But Blair…” Nate struggled to his feet。
Suddenly； she felt the vodka sodas from earlier swirling in her stomach and knew she was going to throw up。 Just like always。 She felt like a confused and lonely fifteen…year…old。 And it was all Nate’s fault。
She ran into the bathroom； kneeled down； and retched into the toilet bowl again and again。 When she was finished； she leaned her forehead against the cool whiteness of the toilet seat； knowing she looked as pathetic as she felt。
“You okay？” she heard from the other side of the door。 Nate’s voice sounded whiny； the way it sometimes did when he was really； really baked。 That was what gave her the motivation to stand up； splash her face with water； vigorously brush her teeth with her imported Marvis toothpaste； and emerge from the bathroom。 Nate was standing at the door； his hands at his sides； shifting from foot to foot。
“Blair—” he began。
“Get out！” Blair yelled with every force of her being。 “You’re bad for me。 I never want to see you again。” She opened the door； her whole body shaking； but Nate just stood there。
“Fine；” she said。 “If you won’t leave； I will。” And with that she was gone。
Sometimes misery doesn’t love pany。
puppy love
Vanessa banged around the kitchen of the loft； feeling like an angry housewife。 It was almost ten o’clock and she hadn’t heard from Hollis since she stormed out of their pitch meeting。 No； scratch t