rather； a cab was waiting for Mrs。 Solomon in 4A； but when the hunter green uniform…clad
doorman saw the terrifying look on Blair？s normally pretty face； he let her take it。
Besides； hailing cabs in the snow was probably the highlight of his day。
The stone walls bordering Central Park were blanketed in snow。 A tall； elderly woman and her
Yorkshire terrier； dressed in matching red Chanel quilted coats with matching black velvet bows in
their white hair； crossed Seventy…second Street and entered the Ralph Lauren flagship store。
Blair？s cab hurtled recklessly up Madison Avenue； past Agn？s B。 and Williams…Sonoma and the
Three Guys coffee shop where all the Constance Billard girls gathered after school； and finally
pulled up to Nate？s town house。
？Let me in！？ she yelled into the inter outside the Archibalds？ elegant wrought…iron…and…glass
front door as she swatted the buzzer over and over with her hand。
Inside； Nate and Serena were still cuddling in the kitchen。 Serena raised her head from his
shoulder and opened her eyes； as if from a dream。 The kiss they？d both been fantasizing about had
never actually happened； which was probably for the best。
？I think I？m warm now；？ she announced and hopped off the counter； posing her face so that
she looked totally calm and cool； like they hadn？t just had a moment。 And maybe they hadn？t？she
couldn？t be sure。 She grinned at the monitor？s distorted image of Blair giving her the
finger。 ？e on in； sweetness！？ she shouted back； buzzing her friend in。
Nate tried to erase the disturbing thought that Blair had caught him and Serena together。 They
weren？t together。 They were just friends； hanging out； which is what friends do when they？re
together。 There was nothing to catch。 It was all in his mind。
Or was it？
？Hey； hornyheads。？ Blair greeted them with snow in her shoulder…length chestnut brown hair。
Her cheeks were pink with cold； her blue eyes were slightly bloodshot； and her carefully plucked
dark brown eyebrows were askew； as if she？d been crying or rubbing her eyes like crazy。 ？I have a
fucked…up story to tell you guys。？ She flung her orange bag down on the floor and took a deep
breath； her eyes rolling around dramatically； milking the moment for all it was worth。 ？As it turns
out； my totally boring； Mr。 Lawyer father； Harold Waldorf； Esquire； is like totally having an affair。
Only moments ago； I caught him asking some random babe； ？If I was a wine； how would you
describe my bouquet？？ and they were； like； totally hiding in his closet。？ She clapped her hand over
her mouth； as if to keep the words in。
Or her breakfast。
？Whoa；？ Serena and Nate responded in unison。
？He just sounded so 。 。 。 slimy；？ Blair wailed through her fingers。
Serena knew this might be even grosser； but she just had to get it out there。 ？Well； maybe he was
just having phone sex with your mom。？ ？Sure；？ Nate agreed。 ？My parents do that all the time；？ he
added； feeling a little sick as he said it。 His navy admiral dad was so uptight he probably wouldn？t
have phone sex for fear of being court…marshaled。
Blair grimaced。 The idea of her tennis…toned…but…still…plump； St。 Barts…tanned；
gold…jewelry…loving mom having any kind of sex； let alone cabernet phone sex； with her skinny；
preppy； argyle…socks…wearing dad； was so unlikely and so pletely icky she refused to even
think about it。
？No；？ she insisted； wolfing down the uneaten half of Serena？s Pop…Tart。 ？It was definitely
another woman。 I mean； face it；？ she said； still chewing； ？Dad is totally hot and dresses really well；
and he？s an important lawyer and everything。 And my mom is totally insane and doesn？t really do
anything and she has varicose veins and a flabby ass。 Of course he？s having an affair。？ Serena and
Nate nodded their glossy golden heads like that made plete sense。 Then Serena grabbed Blair
and hugged her hard。 Blair was the sister she？d never had。 In fourth grade they？d pretended they
were fraternal twins for an entire month。 Their Constance Billard gym teacher； Ms。 Etro； who？d
gotten fired midyear for inappropriate touching？which she called ？spotting？？during tumbling
classes； had even believed them。 They？d worn matching pink Izod shirts and cut their hair exactly
the same length。 They even wore matching gold Cartier hoop earrings； until they decided they
were tacky and switched to Tiffany diamond studs。
Blair pressed her face into Serena？s perfectly defined collarbone and heaved an exhausted；
trembling sigh。 ？It？s just so fucked up it makes me feel sick。？ Serena patted Blair？s back and met
Nate？s gaze over Blair？s Elizabeth Arden Red Door Salon…glossed brown head。 No way was she
going to bring up the whole being…sent…away…to…boarding…school problem？not when her best
friend was so upset。 And she didn？t want Nate to mention it either。 ？e on； let？s go mix
martinis and watch a stupid movie or something。？ Nate jumped off the counter； feeling pletely
confused。 Suddenly all he really wanted to do was hug Blair and kiss away her tears。Was he hot
for her now； too？
It？s hard to keep a clear head when you？re surrounded by beautiful girls who are in love with
you。
？All we have is vodka and champagne。 My parents keep all the good wine and whiskey locked
up in the cabinet for when they have pany；？ he apologized。
Serena slid open the bread pantry； where most families would actually keep bread； but where
Nate？s mom stored the cartons of Gitanes cigarettes her sister sent from France via FedEx twice a
month because the ones sold in the States simply did not taste fresh。
？I？m sure we can make do；？ she said； ripping open a carton with her thumbnail。 ？e。？ She
stuck two cigarettes in her mouth like tusks and beckoned Nate and Blair to follow her out of the
kitchen and upstairs to the master suite。 If anyone was an expert at changing the mood； it was
Serena。 That was one of the things they loved about her。 ？I？ll show you a good time；？ she added
goofily。
She always did。
The Archibalds？ vast bedroom had been decorated by Nate？s mother in the style of Louis XVI；
with a giant gilt mirror over the head of the enormous red…and…gold toile canopy bed； and heavy
gold curtains in the windows。 The walls were adorned with red…and…gold fleur…de…lis wallpaper
and renderings of Mrs。 Archibald？s family？s summer chateau near Nice。 On the floor was a red；
blue； and gold Persian rug rescued from theTitanic and bought at auction by Mrs。 Archibald for
her husband at Sotheby？s。
？Bus Stop？Some Like It Hot？ Or the digitally remastered version ofSome Like It Hot ？？ Serena
asked； flipping through Nate？s parents？ limited DVD collection。 Obviously Captain Archibald
liked Marilyn Monroe movies？a lot。Of course； Nate had his own collection of DVDs in his room；
including a play…by…play of the last twenty years of America？s Cup sailing races。 Thanks； but no
thanks。 His parents？ taste was far more girl…friendly。 ？Or we could just watch Nate play Nintendo；
which is always hot；？ she joked； although she kind of meant it。
？Only if he does it naked；？ Blair quipped hopefully。 She sat down and bounced up and down on