who would bee my new family： A young bouffant…haired Khanum Taheri and the general……Niagara Falls in the background； Khanum Taheri in a seamless dress； the general in a narrow…lapelled jacket and thin tie； his hair full and black； Soraya； about to board a wooden roller coaster； waving and smiling； the sun glinting off the silver wires in her teeth。 A photo of the general； dashing in full military outfit； shaking hands with King Hussein of Jordan。 A portrait of Zahir Shah。
The living room was packed with about two dozen guests seated on chairs placed along the walls。 When Baba entered； everybody stood up。 We went around the room； Baba leading slowly； me behind him； shaking hands and greeting the guests。 The general……still in his gray suit……and Baba embraced； gently tapping each other on the back。 They said their Salaams in respectful hushed tones。
The general held me at arm s length and smiled knowingly； as if saying； Now； this is the right way……the Afghan way……to do it； _bachem_。 We kissed three times on the cheek。
We sat in the crowded room； Baba and I next to each other； across from the general and his wife。 Baba s breathing had grown a little ragged； and he kept
wiping sweat off his forehead and scalp with his handkerchief。 He saw me looking at him and managed a strained grin。 I m all right； he mouthed。
In keeping with tradition； Soraya was not present。
A few moments of small talk and idle chatter followed until the general cleared his throat。 The room became quiet and everyone looked down at their hands in respect。 The general nodded toward Baba。
Baba cleared his own throat。 When he began； he couldn t speak in plete sentences without stopping to breathe。 General Sahib； Khanum Jamila jan。。。 it s with great humility that my son and I。。。 have e to your home today。 You are。。。 honorable people。。。 from distinguished and reputable families and。。。 proud lineage。 I e with nothing but the utmost ihtiram。。。 and the highest regards for you； your family names； and the memory。。。 of your ancestors。 He stopped。 Caught his breath。 Wiped his brow。 Amirjan is my only son。。。 my only child； and he has been a good son to me。 I hope he proves。。。 worthy of your kindness。 I ask that you honor Amir jan and me。。。 and accept my son into your family。
The general nodded politely。
We are honored to wele the son of a man such as yourself into our family； he said。 Your reputation precedes you。 I was your humble admirer in Kabul and remain so today。 We are honored that your family and ours will be joined。
Amirjan； as for you； I wele you to my home as a son； as the husband of my daughter who is the noor of my eye。 Your pain will be our pain； your joy our joy。 I hope that you will e to see your Khala Jamila and me as a second set of parents； and I pray for your and our lovely Soraya jan s happiness。 You both have our blessings。
Everyone applauded； and with that signal； heads turned toward the hallway。 The moment I d waited for。
Soraya appeared at the end。 Dressed in a stunning winecolored traditional Afghan dress with long sleeves and gold trimmings。 Baba s hand took mine and tightened。 Khanum Taheri burst into fresh tears。 Slowly； Soraya caine to us； tailed by a procession of young female relatives。
She kissed my father s hands。 Sat beside me at last； her eyes downcast。
The applause swelled。
ACCORDING TO TRADITION； Soraya s family would have thrown the engagement party the Shirini…khori………or Eating of the Sweets ceremony。 Then an engagement period would have followed which would have lasted a few months。 Then the wedding； which would be paid for by Baba。
We all agreed