4 breaking dawn破晓- 第36部分

Bella：s　body　was　swollen；　her　torso　ballooning　out　in　a　strange；　sick　way。　It　strained　against　the　faded　
gray　sweatshirt　that　was　way　too　big　for　her　shoulders　and　arms。　The　rest　of　her　seemed　thinner；　like　the　
big　bulge　had　grown　out　of　what　it　had　sucked　from　her。　It　took　me　a　second　to　realize　what　the　
deformed　part　was—I　didn't　understand　until　she　folded　her　hands　tenderly　around　her　bloated　stomach；　
one　above　and　one　below。　Like　she　was　cradling　it。　

I　saw　it　then；　but　I　still　couldn't　believe　it。　I'd　seen　her　just　a　month　ago。　There　was　no　way　she　could　be　
pregnant。　Not　that　pregnant。　

Except　that　she　was。　

I　didn't　want　to　see　this；　didn't　want　to　think　about　this。　I　didn't　want　to　imagine　him　inside　her。　I　didn't　
want　to　know　that　something　I　hated　so　much　had　taken　root　in　the　body　I　loved。　My　stomach　heaved；　
and　I　had　to　swallow　back　vomit。　

But　it　was　worse　than　that；　so　much　worse。　Her　distorted　body；　the　bones　jabbing　against　the　skin　of　her　
face。　I　could　only　guess　that　she　looked　like　this—so　pregnant；　so　sick—because　whatever　was　inside　
her　was　taking　her　life　to　feed　its　own。。。。　

Because　it　was　a　monster。　Just　like　its　father。　

I　always　knew　he　would　kill　her。　

His　head　snapped　up　as　he　heard　the　words　inside　mine。　One　second　we　were　both　on　our　knees；　and　
then　he　was　on　his　feet；　towering　over　me。　His　eyes　were　flat　black；　the　circles　under　them　dark　purple。　

〃Outside；　Jacob；〃　he　snarled。　

I　was　on　my　feet；　too。　Looking　down　on　him　now。　This　was　why　I　was　here。　



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〃Let's　do　this；〃　I　agreed。　

The　big　one；　Emmett；　pushed　forward　on　Edward's　other　side；　with　the　hungrylooking　one；　Jasper；　right　
behind　him。　I　really　didn't　care。　Maybe　my　pack　would　clean　up　the　scraps　when　they　finished　me　off。　
Maybe　not。　It　didn't　matter。　

For　the　tiniest　part　of　a　second　my　eyes　touched　on　the　two　standing　in　the　back。　Esme。　Alice。　Small　and　
distractingly　feminine。　Well；　I　was　sure　the　others　would　kill　me　before　I　had　to　do　anything　about　them。　I　
didn't　want　to　kill　girls。。。　even　vampire　girls。　

Though　I　might　make　an　exception　for　that　blonde。　

〃No；〃　Bella　gasped；　and　she　stumbled　forward；　out　of　balance；　to　clutch　at　Edward's　arm。　Rosalie　
moved　with　her；　like　there　was　a　chain　locking　them　to　each　other。　

〃I　just　need　to　talk　to　him；　Bella；〃　Edward　said　in　a　low　voice；　talking　only　to　her。　He　reached　up　to　
touch　her　face；　to　stroke　it。　This　made　the　room　turn　red；　made　me　see　fire—that；　after　all　he'd　done　to　
her；　he　was　still　allowed　to　touch　her　that　way。　〃Don't　strain　yourself；〃　he　went　on；　pleading。　〃Please　rest。　
We'll　both　be　back　in　just　a　few　minutes。〃　

She　stared　at　his　face；　reading　it　carefully。　Then　she　nodded　and　drooped　toward　the　couch。　Rosalie　
helped　lower　her　back　onto　the　cushions。　Bella　stared　at　me；　trying　to　hold　my　eyes。　

〃Behave；〃　she　insisted。　〃And　then　e　back。〃　

I　didn't　answer。　I　wasn't　making　any　promises　today。　I　looked　away　and　then　followed　Edward　out　the　
front　door。　

A　random；　disjointed　voice　in　my　head　noted　that　separating　him　from　the　coven　hadn't　been　so　difficult；　
had　it？　

He　kept　walking；　never　checking　to　see　if　I　was　about　to　spring　at　his　unprotected　back。　I　supposed　he　
didn't　need　to　check。　He　would　know　when　I　decided　to　attack。　Which　meant　I'd　have　to　make　that　
decision　very　quickly。　

Tm　not　ready　for　you　to　kill　me　yet；　Jacob　Black；〃　he　whispered　as　he　paced　quickly　away　from　the　
house。　〃You'll　have　to　have　a　little　patience。〃　

Like　I　cared　about　his　schedule。　I　growled　under　my　breath。　〃Patience　isn't　my　specialty。〃　

He　kept　walking；　maybe　a　couple　hundred　yards　down　the　drive　away　from　the　house；　with　me　right　on　
his　heels。　I　was　all　hot；　my　fingers　trembling。　On　the　edge；　ready　and　waiting。　

He　stopped　without　warning　and　pivoted　to　face　me。　His　expression　froze　me　again。　

For　a　second　I　was　just　a　kid—a　kid　who　had　lived　all　of　his　life　in　the　same　tiny　town。　Just　a　child。　
Because　I　knew　I　would　have　to　live　a　lot　more；　suffer　a　lot　more；　to　ever　understand　the　searing　agony　
in　Edward's　eyes。　

He　raised　a　hand　as　if　to　wipe　sweat　from　his　forehead；　but　his　fingers　scraped　against　his　face　like　they　



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were　going　to　rip　his　granite　skin　right　off。　His　black　eyes　burned　in　their　sockets；　out　of　focus；　or　seeing　
things　that　weren't　there。　His　mouth　opened　like　he　was　going　to　scream；　but　nothing　came　out。　

This　was　the　face　a　man　would　have　if　he　were　burning　at　the　stake。　

For　a　moment　I　couldn't　speak。　It　was　too　real；　this　face—I'd　seen　a　shadow　of　it　in　the　house；　seen　it　in　
her　eyes　and　his；　but　this　made　it　final。　The　last　nail　in　her　coffin。　

〃It's　killing　her；　right？　She's　dying。〃　And　I　knew　when　I　said　it　that　my　face　was　a　watereddown　echo　of　
his。　Weaker；　different；　because　I　was　still　in　shock。　I　hadn't　wrapped　my　head　around　it　yet—it　was　
happening　too　fast。　He'd　had　time　to　get　to　this　point。　And　it　was　different　because　I'd　already　lost　her　so　
many　times；　so　many　ways；　in　my　head。　And　different　because　she　was　never　really　mine　to　lose。　

And　different　because　this　wasn't　my　fault。　

〃My　fault；〃　Edward　whispered；　and　his　knees　gave　out。　He　crumpled　in　front　of　me；　vulnerable；　the　
easiest　target　you　could　imagine。　

But　I　felt　cold　as　snow—there　was　no　fire　in　me。　

〃Yes；〃　he　groaned　into　the　dirt；　like　he　was　confessing　to　the　ground。　〃Yes；　it's　killing　her。〃　

His　broken　helplessness　irritated　me。　I　wanted　a　fight；　not　an　execution。　Where　was　his　smug　superiority　
now？　

〃So　why　hasn't　Carlisle　done　anything？〃　I　growled。　〃He's　a　doctor；　right？　Get　it　out　of　her。〃　

He　looked　up　then　and　answered　me　in　a　tired　voice。　Like　he　was　explaining　this　to　a　kindergartener　for　
the　tenth　time。　〃She　won't　let　us。〃　

It　took　a　minute　for　the　words　to　sink　in。　Jeez；　she　was　running　true　to　form。　Of　course；　die　for　the　
monster　spawn。　It　was　so　Bella。　

〃You　know　her　well；〃　he　whispered。　〃How　quickly　you　see。。。。　I　didn't　see。　Not　in　time。　She　wouldn't　talk　
to　me　on　the　way　home；　not　really。　I　thought　she　was　frightened—that　would　be　natural。　I　thought　she　
was　angry　with　me　for　putting　her　through　this；　for　endangering　her　life。　Again。　I　never　imagined　what　she　
was　really　thinking；　what　she　was　resolving。　Not　until　my　family　met　us　at　the　airport　and　she　ran　right　
into　Rosalie's　arms。　Rosalie's！　And　then　I　heard　what　Rosalie　was　thinking。　I　didn't　understand　until　I　
heard　that。　Yet　you　understand　after　one　second。　。　。　。〃　He　halfsighed；　halfgroaned。　

〃Just　back　up　a　second。　She　won't　let　you。〃　The　sarcasm　was　acid　on　my　tongue。　〃Did　you　ever　notice　
that　she's　exactly　as　strong　as　a　normal　hundredandtenpound　human　girl？　How　stupid　are　you　vamps？　
Hold　her　down　and　knock　her　out　with　drugs。〃　

〃I　wanted　to；〃　he　whispered。　〃Carlisle　would　have___〃　

What；　too　noble　were　they？　

〃No。　Not　noble。　Her　bodyguard　plicated　things。〃　

Oh。　His　story　hadn't　made　much　sense　before；　but　it　fit　together　now。