“She’ll meet you in the conference room at four forty…five；” Allison
said when I picked up my extension。 “You’re wearing black； right？
Insist on Chanel Ruby Red。 Just tell her to bill us。”
The entire office had worked itself up to a nearly hysterical frenzy
trying to make me look appropriate for the night’s gala affair。 It
certainly wasn’t because they all adored me so much and killed
themselves trying to help me out； rather； they knew Miranda had
mandated the makeover and were eager to prove to her the high level
of their taste and class。
Lily finished her charity makeup lesson and I briefly wondered if I
looked ridiculous wearing a floor…length Oscar de la Renta gown and
Bonne Belle Lipsmackers in Fudgsicle。 Probably； but I had turned
down all offers of having a makeup artist e to the apartment。
Everyone on staff tried to insist—and none too subtly—but I
adamantly refused。 Even I had limits。
I hobbled into the bedroom on my four…inch Manolo stilettos and
kissed Alex on the forehead。 He barely looked up from the magazine
he was reading。
“I’ll definitely be home by eleven； so we can go get some dinner or
drinks then； OK？ I’m sorry I have to do this； I really am。 If you do
decide to go out with the guys； call so I can e meet you； OK？” He
had； as promised； e directly from school to spend the night
together； and hadn’t been all that thrilled when I’d arrived home
with the news that he could definitely have a relaxing night at Home
but that I wouldn’t be a part of the plans。 He was sitting on the
balcony off my bedroom； reading an old copy ofVanity Fair we had
lying around and drinking one of the beers Lily kept in the fridge
for guests。 It wasn’t until after I’d explained that I had to work
tonight that I even noticed he and Lily weren’t hanging out。
“Where is she？” I asked。 “She has no classes； and I know she’s not
working Fridays all summer。”
Alex took a swig of his Pale Ale and shrugged。 “I’m guessing she’s
here。 Her door’s closed； but I saw some guy walking around before。”
“Some guy？ Could you be a little more descriptive？ What guy？” I
wondered if someone had broken in； or perhaps Freudian Boy had
finally been invited over。
“I don’t know； but he’s scary…looking。 Tattoos； piercings；
wife…beater—the whole nine。 Can’t imagine where she met this one。”
He took another nonchalant swig。
Icouldn’t imagine where she’d found him； either； considering I’d
left her at eleven the night before in the pany of a very polite
guy named William who； as far as I could see； was not a
wife…beater…wearing； tattoo…donning kind of guy。
“Alex； seriously！ You’re telling me there’s some thug cruising
around my apartment—a thug who may or may not have been invited
over—and you don’t care？ This is ridiculous！ We need to do
something；” I said； getting up from the chair and wondering； as
always； if the weight shift was going to cause the balcony to fall
off the side of the building。
“Andy； relax。 He’s definitelynot a thug。” He flipped a page。 “He
might be a punk…grunge…freak； but he’s not a thug。”
“Great； that’s just fucking great。 Now are you going to e see
what’s going on； or are you just going to sit there all night？”
He still refused to look at me； and I finally understood how annoyed
he was about tonight。 Understandable； entirely； but I was just as
irritated to have to work； and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do
about it。 “Why don’t you call if you need me？”
“Fine；” I huffed and made a big production of storming inside。
“Don’t feel guilty when you find my dismembered body on the bathroom
floor。 Really； no big deal 。 。 。”
I stomped inside and around the apartment for a little while；
looking for evidence of this guy’s presence。 The only thing that
seemed at all out of place was an empty bottle of Ketel One in the
sink。 Had she really managed to buy； open； and drink an entire
bottle of vodka sometime after midnight last night？ I knocked on her
door。 No response。 I knocked a little more insistently； and I heard
a guy’s voice state the very obvious fact that someone was knocking
on the door。 When still no one responded； I turned the doorknob。
“Hello？ Anyone Home here？” I called out； trying not to look inside
the room but only being able to hold out for about five seconds。 My
eyes skipped over the two pairs of jeans that were tangled up on the
floor and the bra that was hanging from the desk chair and the
overflowing ashtray that made the room stink like a frat house and
went directly to the bed； where my best friend was stretched out on
her side； back to me； pletely naked。 A sickly looking guy with a
line of sweat above his lip and a head full of greasy hair blended
into her sheets： his dozens of snaking； winding； scary tattoos acted
as the perfect camouflage against her green and blue plaid
forter。 There was a gold hoop through his eyebrow； much
glittering metal from each ear； and two small； rounded spikes ing
out of his chin。 Thankfully he was wearing a pair of boxers； but
they looked so dirty and dingy and old that I almost—almost—wished
he weren’t。 He pulled on his cigarette； exhaled slowly and
meaningfully； and nodded in my general direction。
“Yo；” he said； waving his cigarette toward me。 “You mind shuttin’
the door there； m’friend？”
What？ “M’friend”？ Was this sleazy…looking Aussie actually givingme
attitude？
“Are you smokingcrack ？” I asked； no longer interested in manners of
any sort； and not at all scared。 He was shorter than me and couldn’t
have weighed more than a hundred thirty—as far as I could tell； the
worst thing he could do to me at that point would be to touch me。 I
shuddered when I thought about the myriad ways he’d probably touched
Lily； who was still sleeping soundly underneath his protective
hover。 “Who the hell do you think you are？ This ismy apartment； and
I’d like you to leave。 Now！” I added； my courage fueled by the time
demands： I had exactly one hour to get gorgeous for the single most
stressful night of my career； and dealing with this strung…out freak
had not been part of the game plan。
“Duuuuuuuude。 Chill out；” he breathed and inhaled again。 “It doesn’t
look like your friend here wants me to leave 。 。 。”
“She would want you to leave if she HAPPENED TO BE CONSCIOUS； YOU
ASSHOLE！” I screamed； horrified that Lily had—in all likelihood—had
sex with this guy。 “I assure you； I speak for both of us when I say
GET THE FUCK OUT OF OUR APARTMENT！”
I felt a hand on my shoulder and whipped around to see Alex； looking
concerned； checking out the situation。 “Andy； why don’t you get in
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