《time enough for love-时间足够你爱(英文版)》

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time enough for love-时间足够你爱(英文版)- 第53部分


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o hundred milliseconds and run all checks to be certain that I have neglected nothing。 I have done so seven times since you asked that question。 Did you notice a lag in my voice at times? Approximately a thousand…kilometer lag?〃
  
  〃What? My dear; I am not equipped to notice a lag of less than thirty thousand kilometers at speed 'c。'〃 He added; 〃Call it a tenth of a second。 You flatter me。〃 Lazarus added thoughtfully; 〃But a tenth of a second is a hundred million of the nanoseconds you use。 Or a hundred milliseconds。 What's that in your time? About a thousand of my days?〃
  
  〃Lazarus; that is not how I would express It。 I split much smaller than a nanosecond in many things I do…a 'millishake' or less。 But I'm just as fortable in your time; I am right now with my personal me。 I could not enjoy singing; or this quiet talk with you; if in my personal mode I were forced to consider each nanosecond。 Do you count each of your heartbeats?〃 …
  
  〃No。 Or rarely。〃
  
  〃It is somewhat the same with me; Lazarus。 The things I do quickly I do with no effort and with no conscious attention other than necessary self…program。 But the seconds and minutes and hours I spend with you; in personal mode; I savor。 I do not chop them into nanoseconds; I grasp them whole and enjoy them。 All the days and weeks you have been here I hold as a single 'now' and cherish it。〃
  
  〃Uh 。 。 hold it; dear! Are you saying that; well; the day Ira introduced us to each other is still 'now' to you?〃
  
  〃Yes; Lazarus。〃
  
  〃Let me sort this out。 Is tomorrow 'now' to you also?〃
  
  〃Yes; Lazarus。〃
  
  〃Uh。 。 but if that is so~ you can predict the future。〃
  
  〃No; Lazarus。〃
  
  〃But… Then I don't understand it。〃
  
  〃I could print 'out the equations; Lazarus; but such equations would merely describe the fact that I am constructed to treat time as one of many dimensions; with entropy but one operator and with 'the present' or 'now' a variable held in steady state for a wide or narrow span。 But in dealing with you I must necessarily move with the wave front that is your personal now…or we cannot municate。〃
  
  〃My dear; I'm not sure we are municating。〃
  
  〃I am sorry; Lazarus。 I have my limitations; too。 But were I able to choose; I would choose your limitations。 Human。 Flesh…and…blood。〃
  
  〃Minerva; you don't know what you are saying。 A fleshand…blood body can be a burden。 。 especially when its maintenance begins to occupy most of one's attention。 You have the best of both worlds…designed in man's own image to do what makes him distinctively human…but better; faster… much faster!…and more accurately; than he can do it…without the aches and pains and inefficiencies of a body that mm eat and sleep and make mistakes。 Believe me。〃
  
  〃Lazarus 。 。 what is 'Eros'?〃
  
  He looked into the gloom and saw in his mind's eye how solemnly and sorrowfully she stared back。
  
  〃Good God; girl…do you want to go to bed with him that badly?〃
  
  〃Lazarus; I do not know。 I am a 'blind man。' How can know?〃
  
  Lazarus sighed。 〃I'm sorry; dear。 Then you know why have kept Dora a baby。〃
  
  〃Only as conjecture; Lazarus。 One that I have not and will not discuss with anyone。〃
  
  〃Thank you…you are a lady; dear。 You do know。 Or you know part of my reason。 But I'll tell you all of it…when feel up to it…and then you will know what I mean by lovc and?why I told Hamadryad it must be experienced; not defined in words 。 。 。 and why I know that you know what by is; because you have experienced it。 But Dora's story is no for Ira; just for you。 No; you can let Ira have it 。 。 after I'm gone。 Uh; call it 'The Tale of the Adopted Daughter'; then place a hold on it and let him have it later。 But I won't tell it now; I'm not strong enough tonight…ask me when you knov I'm feeling up to it。〃
  
  〃I shall。 I'm sorry; Lazarus。〃
  
  〃'Sorry'? Minerva; my very dear; there is never anything to feel sorry about with love。 Never。 Would you rather not love me? Or Dora? Or never have learned of love through lovin! Ira?〃
  
  〃No。 No; not that! But would that I knew 'Eros;' too。〃
  
  〃Count your blessings; dear。 'Eros' can hurt。〃
  
  〃Lazarus; I do not fear being hurt。 But while I know much about male…female reproduction; far more than any singlc human flesh…and…blood knows…〃
  
  〃You do? Or think you do?〃
  
  〃I do know; Lazarus。 In preparation for migrating I added extra additional memory storage…filling much of hold number…two……so that I could transcribe for Ishtar into my new me all the research files and library and restricted records ol
  
  the Howard Rejuvenation Clinic…〃
  
  〃Whew! I think Ishtar took a chance。 The Clinic seems pretty cagey about what they release and don't release。〃
  
  〃Ishtar is not afraid to take chances。 But she did ask me to hurry; so I placed it in temporary here; until I could set up the necessary capacity…large…in Dora's hold。 But I asked Ishtar's permission to study it; and she said it was all right for me to do so; as long as I did not release anything keyed as confidential or secret without consulting her。
  
  〃I found it fascinating; Lazarus。 I now know all about sex in the sense that a man who has always been blind can be taught the physics of a rainbow。 I am even a gene surgeon now; in theory; and would not hesitate to be one;in practice once I had time to construct the ultramicrominiature waldoes needed for such fine work。 I am equally expert as obstetrician and gynecologist and rejuvenator。 Erectile reflexes and mechanics of orgasm and the processes of spermogenesis and impregnation are no mystery to me; nor any aspect of gestation and birth。 '
  
  〃'Eros' alone I cannot know 。 。 and know at last that … I am blind。〃
  
  VARIATIONS ON A THEME
  
  VI
  
  The Tale of the Twins Who Weren't
  
  (Omitted)
  
  …but sky merchant was then my usual occupation; Minerva。 That caper in which I moved from slave to high priest was forced on me。 I had to be meek a long time; which ain't my style。 Maybe Jesus was right when he said that the meek shall inherit the earth…but they inherit very small plots; about six feet by three。
  
  But the only route from field hand to freedom lay through the church and required meekness all the way; so that's what I gave 'em。 Those priests had weird habits… (9;300 words omitted)
  
  …which got me off their damned pla and I never expected to go back。
  
  …did go back a couple of centuries later…freshly rejuvenated and not looking anything like that high priest whose ship had been lost in space。
  
  I was a sky merchant again; which suits me; it lets you travel and see things。 I went back to Blessed for money; not revenge。 I've never wasted skull sweat on revenge; The te de Monte…Cristo syndrome is too much work and not enough fun。 If I tangle with a man and he lives through it; I don't e back later gunning for him。 Instead; I outlive him…which balances the books just as well。 I figured that two centuries was enough for my enemies on Blessed to be dead; since I ha

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